JIM: My little birds told me that you wanted to open this week’s questioning with Varys, Tyrion, and the Worst Cards Against Humanity Team Ever — Grey Worm and Miss Andi. While Tyrion drinks wine and confuses them with his attempts at conversation, Varys elicits information from the prostitute who specializes in the Unhappy Ending and learns that the backers of the Sons of the Harpy are all the masters Dany has pissed off on her way to Mereen.
Speaking of the Khaleesi, if she owned a FitBit she’d have logged a billion steps by now. Anyway, the Mother of Dragons seems poised to become a harpy herself if she is forced to live the rest of her life with the other Khal-widows. She must endure a trial to decide her fate, which considering it’s being held by the Dothraki will surely be a reasonable and measured affair. Have we visited Vaes Dothrak on the show before? I feel like we haven’t but knew you’d know for sure what with your slavish devotion to Westerosi topographical matters. What is Tyrion’s next move now that they know exactly who is to blame for the Sons of the Harpy?
Sweet R’hllor did a ton of shit go down this week! No time for introductions… let’s just get to the questions!!
Es: So in this week’s opening credits I noticed there was no Dorne, and I thought to myself, Well, the odds of this week’s episode being good all the way through certainly improved exponentially!Continue reading →
It’s a new Game of Thrones season with your same old (and I do mean old) recappers. Prince is dead, Trump is very much alive, and whomever cut that Ghostbusters trailer managed to make some of the funniest women in the world appear middling at best. Let’s go to Westeros – a world where things make sense. Sort of.
JIM: We’ll kick things off with everybody’s favorite cuddle monster: Ramsay Bolton. In the wake of his less-than-impressive victory over a hobbled Stannis Baratheon, he takes a quiet moment to reflect on his deceased soulmate, Miranda. He ends his heartfelt eulogy with the pragmatic move of feeding her to the dogs since she’s as much a piece of meat to him as is anyone else, including, I fear, his future step-brother. His hounds are hot on the trail of Theon and Sansa, apparently uninjured from last season’s leap from the parapets. When it seems they are cornered, Brienne and Pod literally ride to their rescue. The tide has turned for Brienne of Tarth as she has avenged her beloved Renly and fulfilled her promise to Catelyn in back-to-back episodes. My questions to you – has Theon paid his debts in full to the Stark family? Did you feel, as I did, that Sansa took a step back in this episode by forgetting to flee when Theon tried to run interference and sitting on her ass while everyone fought for their lives around her? Was her courage rinsed away with her black hair dye last season? Am I being too tough on Lady Sansa by expecting her to become Bad Bitch Sansa?
Yet another Game of Thronesfinale has come and gone, leaving us all completely reeling and asking tons of questions. A whole mess (and I do mean MESS) of things happened this week, so let’s dive right into it!Continue reading →
JIM: Let’s begin with Dorne because, while this storyline was slightly better this week than it has been all season, it still doesn’t carry the emotional heft or straight up kick to the taint that the others carry. Prince Doran summons Jaime, who immediately kicks into incest Dad mode and tell Myrcella she’s not going out dressed like that. I was half waiting for him to tell Trystane “if anything happens to my daughter I have a .45 & a shovel. I doubt anyone would miss you.”
Doran clearly has a long-term plan in mind as he agrees to let Jaime, and after a swift elbow to the chops, Bronn, take Myrcella back to King’s Landing if he agrees that Trystane will take the small council seat promised to Oberyn before, well… you know.
Doran proposes a toast to King Tommen but Elaria would rather pour some out for her homey Oberyn. Doran later threatens to kill her if she doesn’t swear her loyalty to him. Elaria also has a conversation in which she tells Jaime that sister-fucking ain’t so bad. So, do you buy her tears and loyalty to Doran? She seemed to give that up awfully quickly in my opinion. What do you suppose her conversation with Jaime was about? Simply to point out that everyone knows about the incest? And Myrcella sure seems to have a LOT of Cersei in her. She definitely doesn’t seem to be as syrupy as Tommen. Will that serve her well in the future?Continue reading →